What to do after you get engaged?
Congratulations you just got engaged! But what now? Of course it’s really exciting and first up is definitely celebrating with family and friends but what next? Wedding planning can be overwhelming. So after nearly two decades photographing weddings and being art director at leading bridal magazine, Id share my tips on what to do first
Make key decisions just the two of you
This is the most important one, before you do anything else and get anyone else involved. Remember the wedding is about the two of you. What do you both want. Do either of you have ideas about how you want your day to look?
Do you want a big wedding or something intimate? What are the things you really have thought about when youve daydreamed about your wedding? Do you want it here or abroad? If youve been to weddings what did you love about them and what didnt you like? When would you like to get married – sooner or later?
It doesn’t need to be detailed and lots of couples naturally will involve family with guest list and budget discussions, but its good to know what your must haves are together before you chat to family
What to do when you get engaged? Budget doesn’t have to be next
What to do after you get engaged? Until you start planning it is often hard to decide what your budget should be. Some styles of venues will be more costly, but realistically it depends what you are looking for. The overall aesthetic of a wedding will change budgets dramatically too. So a discussion of how you want your wedding to look then research the cost of suppliers that fit that style.
I worked on lots of articles about wedding planning when I worked at wedding magazine and budget often, sensibly comes next. BUT from experience the budget planners I see in magazines and online could be totally inaccurate. Venue costs vary so widely, and so will all your suppliers. So if family members are contributing its worth asking them how much or what they are happy to help with and thinking about what you are happy to spend overall but remember what you have in mind may be a different cost.
For example with with photography – the average wedding coverage is 8 hours that covers from getting ready until after first dance. But you could opt to not have getting ready captured, or you could add longer hours to include more party and fireworks. I even offer shorter elopement times of just a couple of hours. This is ideal if you’re getting married somewhere like Langtons registry. You can opt for one photographer or two. You can opt for a digital gallery with all your images edited or a stunning bespoke album. There are lots of options so you can pick what suits you.
Venue is usually first (photography might be second)
If you dont have a wedding planner and your not hosting in your own grounds, the venue selection is going to set the tone for your whole day and its likely to be your biggest expense. The season when you are getting married should be your first consideration. If you fall in love with stunning garden venue with wisteria up the walls, it wont be the same for a winter wedding. As a photographer I look at venue selection very differently. These would be my priorities
1. Season
This will lead onto the style of your day. You might be flexible before you view, but its easier to pick venues based on season. for a summer wedding I would be optimistic and pick a venue with stunning grounds. For a winter wedding Id want a venue with grand interiors
2. Style
This is often dictated by season. But there is no reason not to have a black tie wedding in summer. Some venues combine stunning grand interiors with beautiful garden space. But if you dream of a black tie do with grand sweeping staircases then visiting barn venues might not be for you, but equally if you love the ideal of a quintessential english garden wedding a hotel in London is probably not going to work as they rarely have garden space. Venue visits can take a while and you often need to book in advance. So do your research online and pick wisely
3. Logistics
Where is the ceremony and where are you getting ready? Having everything all in one place does make it more relaxed. If you want to get married in a special place/religious ceremony, then what are the logistics for getting between the two?
4. Where can you do photos?
Your photos are your memories of the best party you’re likely to ever throw. If you fall in love with that wisteria wall? You need to make sure you get married in May when its flowering. But if you love the idea of a Christmas wedding, you have shorter daylight hours so its worth thinking about inside locations for photos. To be fair inside locations for photographs should always be in the back of your mind. Summer 23 we had a lot of rain so those back up plans were used a lot!
Want venue inspiration head to my blog about my favourite essex wedding venues
You’ve got a date and a venue
Well done these are probably the two biggest and hardest decisions, now you get to book all your other suppliers. Starting with me for your photography of course! You can get more inspiration on my instagram and pinterest too
